a) as bizarre as Amanda Bynes
b) stranger than Crispin Glover
c) as exciting as your first time in a brothel
d) weirder than Charlie Sheen’s tiger blood
e) as delicious as a hot drunk nymphomaniac who thinks you’re George Clooney
The Kings slept on the train from Philadelphia – they didn’t wake up until the 2nd period.
I called Sutter all of the dirty words George Carlin used to say for starting Quick on back-to-back nights following a very hard played emotional win the night before.
Washington needed 2 points badly in order to stay in the playoff race as CBJ was playing Grand Rapids.
Alex Ovechkin, who has never won shit in his career, gave Washington a 2-0 lead and it looked like the Kings would just phone home like ET and regroup for Pittsburgh.
Then they scored a goal and I kind of half cheered while half-assing it at the office.
Then Pancakes (of all fucking people), extended the 2 goal lead heading into the 3rd period and I went to watch my kids swim.
But the Kings put a call in to Criswell who sprinkled magic fairy dust on the club heading into the 3rd period and the Kings not only came back, Dustin Brown (huh?) gave the Kings the lead while I was freaking out in front of fat moms and their ugly kids at the pool.
Then Ovechkin collided with a teammate and knocked him out cold.
Then the referees singlehandedly changed the course of NHL history (an exaggerated sentence I know, but I am a drama queen). Mike Richards was staring at an empty net but he was hooked like a wide mouth bass and the ref called a penalty but not an automatic goal proving once again without a shadow of a doubt that the refs have it in for the Kings this season and that every single call is going to go against them.
Of course Washington scored shorthanded gaining a very valuable point.
When the Kings didn’t win it in OT with a 4 on 3 how many just knew Washington was going to win and screw the Kings over?
But the panel of hockey Gods showed Kings fans that even they can dole out justice.
Overall that was a terrific effort by the boys and a really satisfying (albeit frustrating) win.
The Kings would be in 3rd place if they were in the East.
The Kings are now 26-8-6 when Matt Greene is NOT in the lineup!
Tanner Pearson only had 6 minutes of ice time
Song that does NOT want to be played ion Toronto right now: “Free Falling” by Tom Petty